In 2012, I saw Warren Haynes with Gov't Mule live in concert for the first time. My favorite song lyric from his music is, "Open your heart when all else fails" which is a mantra I repeat to myself constantly. I tend to be very timid when it comes to matters of the heart. I fear the "what if" factor. What if I choose this path, only to find that another was a better deal? I spend more time second guessing my choices than enjoying them to begin with. I believe it may be time to put those indecisive notions to rest. It is time to stop ending things before they start.
While I wouldn't say my personal choices have always ended in failure, I don't have the kind of success stories I would prefer at this point in life. I have been my own worst enemy of sorts. I talk myself out of what could otherwise have been a good future. But, I am putting my foot down now! I will open my heart even if it scares me because it is new territory. I will hold my head up high, try to keep my chin from a fearful quiver, and smile my way through the scary parts. I will be open no matter what.
Even if things don't work out the way I want them to, I will not let that deter me from my new mantra. I am determined that when I find myself at a loss after taking many different turns which produce the same predictable results, I will still continue to open my heart. I will tell myself that at least I tried and that is better than the "what if" I hadn't taken a chance at all. This won't just apply to romantic relationships either. I can be pretty closed off in friendship too. So, it is important to apply the "open heart" policy to all personal relationships.
As the song goes on to say, "Hindsight is very clear when loneliness is falling..." It's in those quiet moments of retrospect that I start to rework past situations that could have been different if I'd only been more open. If I had learned to soften instead of harden in relationships, I might find myself in a different place. Perhaps I'd be writing frilly, mushy fairy tale blogs. Well, probably not. But I might be able to have as many success stories as failing ones. I've seen how things turn out by being closed off, so now is as good a time as any to see what outcome being open brings.
-ldw
