The Only Exception

"...if they say nothing lasts forever, then what makes love the exception?"

Everything runs its course eventually. The idea that there is one person for us to be with forever is absurd to me. I think this idea has only led most of us searching for this "one" and finding ourselves completely bummed out when we haven't found them yet. Instead we are missing the significance of all our little loves while waiting for the big one. What if there is no big "one" for some of us? What if we aren't meant to find one person because we are meant to inspire and love many?

It has recently occurred to me that my own commitment issues stem from the very thought that I don't want to choose the wrong "one" and miss out on this so-called Mr. Right. So, instead of committing to the wrong choice and risking possible heartache, I have refused to choose at all. Or I just keep choosing all the wrong options because I know full well they are going nowhere. I have been playing it safe with my heart for a very long time now. I doubt I would even be able to give it away at this point after keeping it protected for so long. Over the years, I have somehow learned to compartmentalize my heart, keeping some people locked in there just in case. Others have a place there because the moments and time I shared with them are just too amazing to cast away as casual occurrences. What can I say? I am a true hopeless romantic. I romanticize the most about the people that I am least likely to end up with...the hopeless choices...the lost causes. I find myself more enamored with the ones I spent the least amount of time with, or more accurately with the ones who were never meant to stay.

Maybe I wasn't actually playing it safe, but playing the part I am meant to play. What if I'm one of those who never settles because I'm not meant to do that. I'm not meant to tie myself to one person because I'm supposed to be a muse of sorts. Over the course of my adult life, I have met many amazing men who I obviously did not settle down with. The majority of those men have found their happy ending with another, yet I know I was a helpful stepping stone to get them there. I realize some who read this won't agree, or will find it as a pessimistic way to look at things. I don't see it that way at all. The older I get, the more obvious it is to me that I'm not meant to settle. I don't think I could. Sure, I get lonely sometimes and think it would be nice to have a warm body to sleep beside each night. Then, I remind myself of those nights when I really like climbing into bed, stretching out, and not worrying about anybody stealing the covers.
So, in the span of forever, what DOES make love the exception? I guess I'll know when I find it. [Kudos to those who already have...you're what we like to call "the lucky ones"] Until I join your ranks, there are a lot of other things for me to discover and experience in life that should keep me busy. Although, this hopeless romantic does have one exception that has been on her mind lately...maybe because he never stole the covers.

["Hey Ya" by Outkast song lyrics quoted above.]